End of January: how are those new years resolutions unfolding? Are you forming new habits or has it started to go a bit pear-shaped?
Fear not, this timely article is here to help you grab those resolutions by the horns and to bring them back, and stay, on track.
Personally, I think sticking to goals, or making changes to your lifestyle, is less about discipline and more about strategy. So, if you have already fallen off the “change wagon”, rein in those horses and take a moment to catch your breath and learn about the terrain ahead. Hopefully you’ll find some strategies here to help you hitch those horses up and continue with your journey.
Now if you started your resolutions off all “guns a blazing”, aiming for dramatic changes then you may have been setting yourself up to fail. A big spurt of motivation is useful for a one-off change, but for those resolutions that require continuous action, small consistent changes are much more likely to stick and produce the results you’re after. The biggest mistake people make is trying to do too much too soon. Instead, focus on tiny, manageable actions.
You may have had intentions for how and when to start your change of, or new, habits, but did you spend time on the why? Why do you want to change? What will the benefits be? How does the change link to your values? Being clear about your “bigger picture” from the start helps cement the changes you wish to make. For example, if you value your health and want to add exercise to your sedentary lifestyle, then remembering that you want to be fit and what this means for your health can give you the nudge to get up off the sofa and go for a walk. Because walking means movement which means healthy which is important to you.
A bit of self-reflection helps – what is your history of change-making like? Which changes were successfully implemented in the past and which were not? Think about what worked and what went wrong. In other words, identify the barriers to change that you might encounter so that you can be prepared if and/or when these pop up again.
A good way to ensure a new habit sticks, is to tag it onto your routine. This helps to provide a trigger for your new behaviour. It could be a specific time, place, or situation. For example, the late and great Michael Mosely recommended practicing your balance whilst brushing your teeth, I do stretches whilst my morning coffee brews. Are you more energetic and motivated in the morning or the evening? Consider your natural energy peaks throughout the day, as this may be relevant to the changes you wish to make.
This also means you need to be prepared and organised. You could add the habit to your calendar so that it becomes part of your schedule and is being prioritised. You could include time for cooking, meditating, or even to call a friend. Make sure your environment facilitates the new behaviours you wish to action. For example, put reminders on your phone, leave your exercise clothes by the bedroom door to remind you to go for a run, prepare your breakfast the night before. Help yourself to help yourself.
We are motivated to repeat behaviours that feel good, or have rewards associated with them. Use this psychology on yourself, notice the positive feeling for example of being in control, or pour yourself a cup of coffee or even just take a moment to feel grateful that you managed to do the thing that day.
Be kind to yourself when you mess up, because realistically there are days when you may go off track. What’s important is being consistent, not perfect. Sometimes you can manage a little walk, other days you may run a mile. Some days you may eat cake – just make sure you start back with the salads tomorrow.
Now then, hitch your wagon to a star, as the saying goes, but remember the tortoise… slow and steady …. And anytime you fall off the wagon, have a little cry if you must, then just dust yourself off, and get back on with it!
As a therapeutic coach I have helped many to make life changes, both big and small. If you need help to improve your lifestyle, progress in your career or are struggling with mental health issues, give me a call.
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